Talk:Commissar

A lure into playing W40K?

Should we state that Ciaphas Cain books are probably one of the best ways to get into warhammer 40k as a starter?

No. Because they are full of anti-fluff BL shit. Fatum 16:50, 27 January 2009 (UTC)

Awwww, why so bad. Also, what do you mean by BL? (Note: most of /tg/ got into warhammer by reading Hero of the Imperium)

I love you

To be honest, the Dawn of War franchise is a more entertaining and immersive way to get someone interested in 40k. I've never heard of anyone getting in by reading Ciaphas Cain, ever. Remoon101 20:39, 7 December 2011 (UTC)

I would have to say that today Dawn of War and the Horus heresy series are the typical entry points into w40k

It did for me! I had little genuine interest in Warhammer 40K until my local book store convinced me to read a Ciaphas Cain omnibus when I mentioned I was considering playing X-Wing TTG as a Star Wars fan. One year later and I've spent almost $12G on the fluff and crunch with playing Warhammer 40K: Space Marine sealing the deal shortly after finishing the omnibus. :D

Doesn't need to be in the article though as it is more of a skub/fan-wank thing. Everyone has a different thing that flamed their interest in W40K after all. -- TheDesertRunner (talk) 12:06, 5 October 2017 (UTC)

http://2ch.so/po/src/1323285463063.jpg Add this pic anyone

That man is too glorious to be a mere commissar. I would sooner believe he is Master of the Administratum.

Cough: http://warhammer40kfanon.wikia.com/wiki/Lord_Commisar_Core

"One year later and I've spent almost $12G" That is a stupidly huge, albeit glorious amount of money to spend in a year. --Lord Of The Lemmings (talk) 02:02, 10 September 2019 (UTC)

What's An Iterator?

What's An Iterator?

During the Great Crusade They were highly trained and very charismatic speakers whose purpose was to essentially convince the populations of recently discovered planets to accept the Imperial truth. You can basically think of them as propaganda mouthpieces for the Imperium helping to bring about compliance peacefully when possible as an alternative to outright invasion.

You know from back in the day before the Imperium became such a shitty place to liv- IF YOU DON'T LIKE LIVING THAN DON'T *click* *BLAM!* FUCKING HERETIC

I'd describe it more as they were missionaries during the great crusade that traveled with the military, except instead of convincing people to join their religion, they are convincing populations to be atheist.--Emerald Claw (talk) 07:28, 15 January 2018 (UTC)

Remove "Female Commissiars"

I certainly don't think that this paragraph deserves to exist on the page, it is pretty much pointless, can we agree on removing it?

Alright this is blatantly wrong now. It is rare for mix sex regiments to be present. It is stated as much in numerous places. In the codex stormtroopers it states that most female schola students end up in the sisters although they do make up many places in the ranks of officers along with commissars.Dragoon508 (talk) 23:26, 21 August 2015 (UTC)

Took care of it, it's not perfect but at least somewhat accurate--Magnus Arkelheid (talk) 10:03, 23 August 2015 (UTC)

Has Commissar Hark surpassed Commissar Holt in terms of bitch-slapping ?

Just wondering if Commissar Hark from the Gaunts Ghosts series has surpassed Commissar Holt in terms of epic bitch-slapping. In the book Only In Death there is a scene where Hark is reprimanding Junior Commissar Ludd and bitch slaps him not once... not twice... but 4 separate times during the lecture.

Keep your stupidity to yourself

Real-world jokes have no place in that in-universe segment, you goddamn /pol/tard. Now kindly fuck off!

It's a fucking Soviet Russia joke, unwad your panties. Soviet Commissars were cited as their actual inspiration for fuck's sake.

Beyond that, though, the "joke" genuinely added nothing to a page already heavily saturated with a near-terminal case of the unfunny, and without any further overtly political context the "gb2/pol/" just straight up doesn't work either. --2600:1700:19C0:2760:19C8:AA6:12F0:9EEF 18:55, 20 September 2020 (UTC)

I'm surprised you actually bothered to take it to the talk page, even if you did continue the edit war. As for the 'place', it's a harmless comment, unless /pol/=any insult to any failed state, then it's not /pol/ at all. --58.162.223.230 05:33, 20 September 2020 (UTC)

I'm going to have to agree with the other anon, real-world jokes do not translate well to the wiki outside of the /pol/ page, especially when they're political in nature. This is also why we deleted all the god-emperor Trump jokes when they originally showed up. -- Triacom (talk) 07:06, 20 September 2020 (UTC)

That's a fair argument and more acceptable than the edit war he tried. But I'd argue that it's no different really from chucking in a joke about 'don't worship X religion'. The Trump jokes on the other hand were cringy, overused and disliked by /tg/ as a whole. Though I'd also admit changing the Soviet joke to 'Never salute the anthems of ancient terran states' might be more suitable. --58.162.223.230 07:11, 20 September 2020 (UTC)

Then go ahead and change it to that, I doubt anyone would complain. I'm also going to edit the page, mainly cutting down the ridiculous number of topquotes. -- Triacom (talk) 07:34, 20 September 2020 (UTC)

Will do, I'll wait a few hours so our edits don't conflict, though. --58.162.223.230 07:38, 20 September 2020 (UTC)

Massive Deletions

I imagine this might ruffle a few feathers, since it seems the article hasn't been tended to in a very long time, but I'll explain why over 8k characters were suddenly shot down like a fleeing Guardsman:

The blam joke was heavily overused, and stretched to the point it stopped being funny even before the article proper started. Having the joke is fine, having people arguing about it on the front page as we're watching an improv skit is not. Just look at what was posted:

• THEY'RE SONS OF BITCHES! *BLAM!* HERESY! YOU SEE HE SHOT ME, WHAT AN ASSHOLE! QUIET, HERETIC! *BLAM* I'm not dead! *BLAM!-BLAM!* DOUBLE HERESY! ONLY CHAOS INFESTED HERETICS REFUSE TO DIE FOR THEIR COMMISSARS I FEEL FINE!*BLAM!-BLAM!-BLAM!-BLAM!-BLAM!-BLAM!* I don't want to go on the cart! *BLAM!* SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! I'll be back! BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTT!!!!

This kind of thing was a plague when it was all over the Dark Angels page and it has not gotten better with time, and if you find it funny, just remember that you could find 5 more examples just like it, have you ever laughed 6 times in a row when the jokes told were the exact same joke 6 times? This also covers most of my deletions until the part on the page with the "what not to do" section, and even then it's still pretty relevant. The other reason I deleted stuff there was because the "do not give Commissars weapons" joke was done twice, and it was the same joke both times. The second time however did not have the same progression from bad to worse, so I removed it because it was redundant.

Next up is the "what to do" section. I removed the bits that were actually "what not to do" since they're in the wrong section, and while I get what they were trying to say, that you're damned if you do and damned if you don't, they got the idea off very poorly. There was already a great example of how you're screwed either way in that section so getting rid of the poor examples makes it stand out a lot more. If somebody wants to add more to that section it would be a good idea to add in polar opposites (preferably without hamming up the blam meme) since that gets across the idea that you're just done for.

Finally I removed the meta joke that was the result of meta argument-jokes, the out of date rules joke that spoiled the good joke, the argument again, and the comment that added nothing. A page doesn't get better just because it gets longer, and I'd advise anyone who wants to add to it to seriously consider the quality of what they're adding. -- Triacom (talk) 08:21, 20 September 2020 (UTC)

I know I am super late, but what if we made a containment page? We have a page dedicated to bbn people spamming Dakka, and I think there's a page with Sly Marbo Jokes, so why not a page of only Commissar Jokes? --Lord Of The Lemmings (talk) 15:52, 3 January 2021 (UTC)

That seems pretty excessive, especially when the jokes removed aren't very good or are just bad. Nobody has tried to add them back in the meantime either. -- Triacom (talk) 19:28, 3 January 2021 (UTC)

Wouldn't work. The fun police will still find ways to ruin it for everyone because we're starting to make rules, in a wiki that explicitly says we barely have any rules. Tactical Mehren (talk) 20:10, 3 January 2021 (UTC)